The attempt to think of an effective bribe to motivate our son is fairly constant, but sometimes I’m still surprised by what works. He came up with the system of “tally marks” himself, whereby he can increase (or reduce) his allowance by his behavior. Doing something the first time he’s asked is good for a positive mark, as is doing his homework without reminder, and remembering to do things like take his dishes to the sink or pick up his Legos. Whining is good for a negative, as is gratuitous rudeness. It’s working beautifully, not least because he’s learning to be mindful of his own behavior, tone of voice, responsibilities and so forth.
But I still need, sometimes, to come up with something a little more extraordinary. I have some seriously overdue housecleaning in hand, and I want his help. (It doesn’t hurt that a large part of the chaos is of his creation, either.) So I made him an offer. If he would help me, not only would he earn a plus-mark, but we would make immediate use of the cleaned-up kitchen for me to teach him how to make a butter cake from scratch – reading a recipe, gathering and measuring ingredients, how to use the mixer and what butter and sugar creamed together looks like – the whole thing, start to finish, with an additional plus-mark if he stays with me through the whole process instead of saying “too hard, you finish it.” I was expecting him to want to think about it. Instead his whole face lit up and he bounced in enthusiasm. So that’s what we’ll be doing. The cleaning process got a start today. I expect we’ll be ready to bake by tomorrow. And then, of course, he’ll get to decorate his magnum opus.
“And then, of course, he’ll get to decorate his magnum opus.”
How does one decorate a .357 or .44 caliber penguin?